To draw parallels between wedding preparations and having my teeth pulled wouldn’t be too far from the truth, at least for the last couple of months.

I’ve never really been much of a people person. Admittedly, I’m more socially awkward than social butterfly. And ironically, while a marriage involves myself and one other person, a wedding involves everyone else, and their expectations of us. Consequently I find my forbearance being tried every day at a time when my social interactions are at a life-time high.

It’s not an exaggeration at this point to say I’m literally aching for time in solitude.

The relationship between my mother and me has always been volatile, but tensions have escalated to the point of acrimonious cos every other conversation we have turns into an argument. I want to say she’s unreasonable, but I don’t deny I have a part to play in every instance of disagreement. I could be more patient, less spiteful, more empathetic, less irritable, but it always takes two hands to clap.

The relationship between the fiance and myself is less contentious but as the date draws closer, I’m increasingly less convinced that peace will ensue till the big day.

People say that this is normal – that tensions will run high, tempers will flare in the lead up to the big day. But that just seems counter-intuitive to me. If I’ve decided to spend the rest of my life with someone, why are we endaevouring to organise an event that places undue strain on the relationship? Is this supposed to be some final test of compatbility and forbearance before we take the leap?

I cannot fathom how the upheavals that come from planning a wedding benefits the eventual marriage, and yet it must be done, it is one more milestone to get to, to get through. Right now, I’m just hanging tight, hoping that not too much goes awry, praying that relationships will not be irrevokably damaged as result of planning this one event.

But on a brighter note, I’m now officially back at home with a brand new suitably-equipped kitchen and dry pantry that is nothing if not nuturing to my (not so) newfound love for baking. So I promise to write about baking soon. Really soon.

Last week, E and I had dinner with his parents and sister at this Italian place. One of the specials was a burrata rocket salad with these little red tomatoes which go by names like cherry tomatoes, or worse, honey tomatoes which is very often a misnomer cos they’re rarely sweet enough to be associated […]

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I had an amazing time with the BFF in Melbourne back in early May.  We were there for four full days – two days in the city, and two days heading to and from the Mornington Peninsula.  So many highlights, so many lessons, it’s true what they say, you can’t know someone until you’ve travelled […]

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A girlfriend told me earlier this week that her kids remarked that “Auntie L must be rich, cos she drives a bright red Mercedes.”  That was somewhat flattering… I think.  I don’t think they meant anything by it though personally, I think wealth, or the perception thereof, is relative.  To someone who would and could splash […]

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I’ve spent the last 48 hours ruminating.  It’s a strange time to be thinking because I’m in transition – at the tail end of my vacation, on the plane on the way home, catching up on my sleep, and getting back to the grind after 3 days of temporary work-amnesia.  But with me, things are […]

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It’s a long weekend, and I have grand plans to stay home and vegetate.  Sleep a lot, watch a lot of TV and catch up on my reading, and do whatever it is that catches my fancy. But the embargo on going out also means meals need to be self-catered. So for lunch today, I decided […]

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I’ve been struggling to stay on top of my life recently. A lot of times, I feel like a spectator in the things are happening around and to me. Cos there are simply too many variables in any one situation, and there’s no way I can anticipate all of it. So I sit back most […]

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I’m trying to cut back on baking.  Work takes priority in the day time, so the only time I get to bake, other than the weekends, is in the evenings after work.  But in the evenings, I exercise, I meet E or friends for dinner, or I cook myself dinner, and all that competition for […]

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It’s the Easter weekend.  A lovely long one.  And I made a cake.  Just for me. It’s a simple vanilla sponge, minimally frosted with a mango ermine buttercream made with unsweetened mango puree, topped off with some white sprinkles, in keeping with the minimalist theme. The sponge cake was nothing to write home about, I […]

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Sleep has been kind of elusive recently. I’m not entirely sure what I’m doing differently. I think it might be that I recently went back to running again, but that barely makes sense since exercise is supposed to promote sleep, rather than detract from it.  Perhaps I’m not running far or often enough.  I’m not […]

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